FRIDAY FUN WITH WORDS ~ THE IDIOSYNCRASIES OF ENGLISH

FRIDAY FUNCROPPEDPHOTOPAD

FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY, 

AS WELL AS THE IDIOSYNCRASIES OF ENGLISH:

Some chuckles for you that I received in a recent e-mail about just how peculiar our English language can be ~

TEQUILAOne tequila, two tequila, three tequila…… Floor.

 

MONKEYIf man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

BOOKSTOREI went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, “where’s the self- help section?” she said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

QUESTIONWhat if there were no hypothetical questions?

 

 FOREST RANGERWhere do forest rangers go to “get away from it all?”

 

FLYWould a fly without wings be called a walk?

GAS STATIONWhy do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will break-in and clean them?

PARSLEYIf a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

TURTLEIf a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

ANIMAL CRACKERS2Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

 

ATM MACHINEWhy do they put braille on the drive-through bank machines?

DEER CROSSINGHow do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road signs?

SOUR CREAM BESTWhy is there an expiration date on sour cream?

SLICED BREADWhat was the best thing before sliced bread?

 

MERMAIDDoes the little mermaid wear an algebra?(tricky)

 

SWIMMERCROPPEDIf one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

PASTAIf you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?

WATER DROPLET HAPPY ICON GIMPCROPPEDHave a great weekend
from your friends at Rainsoft Ottawa,
Eternally Pure Water Systems, Inc
.

LAUGHING2GIMPCROPPED

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