I AM CANADIAN
I’m not a lumberjack
or a fur trader
And I don’t live in an igloo
Or eat blubber or own a dog sled
I have a Prime Minister,
not a President
I speak English and French,
I can proudly sew my country’s
flag on my backpack.
I believe in peacekeeping, not policing
Diversity, not assimilation
And that the beaver is a
truly proud and noble animal.
A toque is a hat.
Canada is the second largest landmass
in the world.
The first nation of hockey
And the best part of North America!
My name is [insert your name here]
And I AM CANADIAN!
The following humour describes Canada and Canadians alike in a most apt fashion…
Someone in a Home Depot offers you assistance… and they don’t work there.
You’ve worn shorts and a parka at the same time.
You’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong number.
You measure distance in hours.
You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
You have switched from “heat” to “A/C” in the same day and back again.
You can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching.
You install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked.
You carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them.
You design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
The speed limit on the highway is 80 km and you’re going 90 and everybody is passing you.
Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.
You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
You find 2 degrees “a little” chilly.
If you actually understand these Canadian jokes,
we’re great enough to make and take these jokes about ourselves and about some of the quirky aspects of our lives.
Laugh along with us and have a great weekend ‘y’all’. (yeah, I know – not Canadian)